Pile of Sugar - Our Story

My trusty ol' smart phone missed a lot of action this week, including the entire visit of Yaya and Papa Steve but I did manage to catch a sweet moment or two here and there...

Found this pile of sugar at the top of the stairs when we headed up to bed late one night last week...

My sweetheart and my sweetie pie...

Let summertime begin!

Time marches on. Now I have a wall in my house to remind me.

Ever.

Today my house is full of people I love and it's the best St. Valentine's Day I have ever known.

Happy Birthday Ponder Sissy!

1. She answers more quickly to Sissy than to Ponder.

2. She thinks for herself.

3. You can't make Sissy do anything Sissy doesn't want to do.

4. She loves to snuggle.

5. She prefers juice, but will drink water out of her "watoo boddool."

6. Her skin is probably the softest surface on the planet.

7. "I wuv you."

8. "I baseball."

9. "I go back to church. NO! I go back to school."

10. She has the most adorable version of "Take Me Out To The Ballgame." You will probably never hear it though because she won't give command performances. (See #3.)

11. Like her sister Afton she loves Sleeping Beauty. She likes to pretend she is "MannyWetter" the blue fairy. (Merryweather.)

12. She can sing every word to the Sleeping Beauty song "Once Upon A Dream" and has been able to sing it all since she was just over one year old. She could sing that entire song before she was even really talking.

13. She loves to play with Afton. Just follows her around and giggles her heart out.

14. From the first moment she laid eyes on baby Rose she was smitten. She calls her Rosie. She sounds so cute when she says it I think I am going to let it stick.

15. She is fearless.

15. She is very independent.

16. She is no good after nap until she has been snuggled for at least five minutes. "Hold you." And what a delicious five minutes they are.

17. She loves her small baby doll named "Tiny Sister."

18. She also loves her bigger baby doll named "Boy."

19. She knows and understands a lot more than she lets on. Every now and then I catch her being smarter than she wants me to think she is.

20. She removed the lighting and music piece from inside her Glow Worm and uses it as a "lantern". (See #19)

21. We call her our little engineer. (See #20)

22. We think she is going to be a lefty. (See #21)

23. We have yet to find a form of discipline that deters her from anything she has her heart set on doing. Thankfully, we still have prayer.

24. She is ridiculously cute in pig tails.

25. You'll probably never see her wearing them though because she won't leave them in. (See #3)

26. She loves silly games.

27. She loves listening to "my songs" in the car.

28. Holy Holy Holy is her favorite song.

29. She calls all balls basketballs and she loves them.

30. She can already drink out of a big girl cup and sits in a big girl chair at the table.

31. She is heartbroken at the indignity of having her food cut into bite size pieces. She cries and cries and moans "Like a big girl! Like a big girl!"

32. She has a lot of nicknames. Peanut, Sweet P, Putter Butter but "Ponder Sissy" is what Afton has been calling her since she was about five months old and that is by far her most widely used nickname. Sissy doesn't seem like a nickname at all anymore. That is just who she is.

33. "I Sissy!"

34. She loves princesses.

35. "Sissy, are you a princess?" "No! I orange."

36. You have to earn her smile, but when you do it is a smile that will melt your heart.

37. She loves her princess potty Daddy got her. "I did it! Gwate job!"

38. She can build a serious "cackle"with legos and blocks. (Castle.)

39. Her favorite toy to date is a small yellow strip of plastic named "Stripe."

40. She loves Wilson the dog next door.

41. She is not easily impressed.

42. She can sit and turn the pages of books for hours.

43. She is perfectly happy to play all by herself.

44. She likes taking things apart and putting them back together. (See #21.)

45. She likes things to be just so.

46. She calls all clothing "jammies".

47. She loves all shoes and can walk quite well in adult shoes. Even boots.

48. Her favorite book is "We're Going on a Bear Hunt" and she knows most of it by heart. She calls it "Tip Toe".

49. When Afton asks her when she will be done with a certain toy she always says very confidently "Five."

50. We can already tell that is going to be an athlete.

51. She will climb anything. (See # 15)

52. She can balance like nobody's business.

53. Still, I know it is just a matter of time until she falls down all of our stairs.

54. At the beginning of the summer she was terrified of water and swimming, now she can't get enough.

55. She is lost without Afton.

56. She loves riding on Daddy's shoulders.

57. She gets carsick just like Mommy.

58. She loves dressing up.

59. She turns purple when she eats or gets cold. Pretty crazy really.

60. She likes to ask Rose "You naughty? You nice? You a boy? You a girl?"

61. "I fight you!"

62. "And then....and then....and then."

63. "Thas rude!"

64. She has best lion roar I have ever heard!

65. She has an iron will.

66. She is not easily impressed.

67. "I no like it."

69. She likes to be with her people.

70. She has been finding a way to tip over her car seat since she was an infant.

71. She doesn't like help going to the potty.

72. She doesn't like help with pretty much anything.

73. "No, I help!"

74. She likes to help others though.

75. She loves to push the button on the coffee pot in the mornings.

76. She loves Woody (also called "Toy Movie) and Buzz Lightyear (also called "Buzz Light").

77. She is a watcher and a listener.

78. She loves buckling and unbuckling any kind of buckle.

79. She loves coloring on the walls. If she can't do it with crayons she will do it with painted blocks or something like that.

80. She likes Little Einsteins.

81. She loves animals.

83. She loves pointing at things and telling you what they are.

84. She doesn't really like snow, grass, or sand.

85. She loves balloons.

86. She is our pickiest eater. We used to have to put a little bit of orange juice in her milk to get her to drink it. Yuck!

87. She is a quick and quiet learner.

88. She claps her hands to tell you she wants something.

89. When we are eating at Chipotle she starts off using a fork but usually resorts to finishing her burrito bowl with her fingers.

90. She can make a pretty big mess when she is eating but it will all be on her hands and face and the table and floor. Her clothes seem to always make it out unscathed.

91. "It's not easy being Sissy." and "That's just Sissy being Sissy." have become common phrases around here to describe life with Sissy.

92. Lately when she sees Rose she points at her and says, "Mommy, what's that? That Rosie Posie."

93. "Right, Mommy?"

94. When we are in the car and I smile at her in the rear view mirror she melts into one of the cutest smiles I have ever seen. It never fails.

95. It may not be easy being Sissy, but she does a great job at it.

96. She has also done a great job at capturing all our hearts.

97. She makes each of our lives richer and more beautiful. So happy God chose to add her to our family.

98. She is one of the sweetest blessings He has ever given us.

99. Happy Birthday Ponder Sissy! Can't believe we have only known you for two years.

100. Looking forward to many more years of seeing you grow in grace and beauty and just spending everyday watching Sissy being Sissy.

She's Here...

...and we couldn't love her more.

Rose Virginia Babington

born

March 26, 2010

at

10:21 AM

8 lbs. 12 oz.

20 3/4 in.

Be Here Now

In honor of St. Valentine's Day I wanted to post my favorite love song of all. I haven't heard another song that captures the unique beauty of the stage in life we and many of our friends and family are in right now. We can swing back and forth so much between the mundane repetitiveness of everyday and looking forward and working to the next big thing that it is easy to miss the splendor of love that is all around us. I love this song and how it makes me remember how much I love my life. Listen to the words and I think you will too. (You can get rid of the annoying Google ads in the video by making it full screen and then xing out of them.)

"Its 1:53 in the morning -- is it time for me to declare my intentions?"

Five years ago tonight the brief silence in my kitchen was broken by those words.



"You tell me." I responded coyly, and so began the conversation that would change my life. Forever. For better.

We discussed whether or not we wanted to "give it a try" for a couple of minutes and then we spent the next two hours discussing what giving it a try would look like for us. It was more than a mere DTR. (Though, we had no doubt that was what our friends would be calling it the next morning.) For us it was the beginning of our Great Attempt . That was what we christened the new direction our relationship was taking that night. Our attempt to learn to love well and then to love as well as we possibly could and to never stop learning to love well and loving as well as we possibly could. Our attempt to work hard at our love from the beginning and meet problems and pitfalls head on and handle them rather than be handled by them. We didn't use all those words just then, for fear of saying too much, but five years into it that is pretty much how I would sum it up. So yeah, pretty heavy stuff for your average DTR. Maybe that explains why we engaged two weeks later.

I have never stopped being thankful for that night. I never will. I will never stop being thankful to Ron for having the courage to "declare his intentions" when it would have been just as easy not to. I will never stop being thankful to God for the little and big providences he crafted into our lives up to that point so that when that night of great importance came we were as ready as we could be. Neither of us deserved to be as ready as we were.

So, how is it going, this Great Attempt of ours? We are about a mile and a half into our marathon. It is still exciting. It is still hard to believe we are actually really going for it. It is fun. It is a whole lot of fun actually. And, it is already harder than I thought it would be. Turns out the hard work that love requires takes more than love alone to accomplish. It takes nothing less than the grace of God. Fortunately, we serve an extravagantly generous God. It is already a whole lot better than I thought it would be too. It is by far the most rich and rewarding endeavor of my life. I am fortunate beyond words that this bright, pleasant path is the path God has chosen for me. When I think about it in that way I realize that the hard work of love is actually really, really easy.

So, Ron, when you read this, know that I am glad. I am glad I didn't have to work that Sunday. I am glad you spent all afternoon at my house. I am glad yet another silly boy was leading Christen S. on at the time. I am glad I had lived enough to be indignant with him for doing so. I am glad you didn't leave for Charlottesville after the Grammys were over. And I am so very glad you chose me as your partner in this Great Attempt. Attempting with you day after day has been the proudest enterprise of my life. Knowing that you will be here with me, until death parts us, attempting with all God gives you is the sure and solid underpinning of all my earthly joys.

Happy five years as us. I love you.

If I Had Tonight To Live Over Again...

...when Afton came running out of her room and peered cutely at me around the corner until I noticed her and then put out her adorable arms and said "Hold?" I would scoop her up and instead of just smiling at her and walking her back to bed like I did I would bring on to the couch with me. I would snuggle her and listen to her talk about babies and dogs and ducks and cups. If she asked me for a cup I would get her one without even trying to remember how much milk or juice she had already had today. Instead of thinking, "I know she is precious, but she needs to learn to stay in bed. We must have order" I would think, "I know I was looking forward to relaxing, but I need to make the most of these precious days. They go by so fast." Instead of basking in the silence of an empty living room I would bask in the brilliance of my daughter's sweet wide eyed innocence. The kind that just won't last forever. If I had tonight to live over I might even let her stay up until Daddy got home. What would it have hurt? And she wouldn't have made it that long anyway. All she really wanted was ten minutes more and if I had tonight to live over again I would have given them to her. It wouldn't have hurt anything. It wouldn't have spoiled her for life. She may have been a little more tired tomorrow morning and she may have tried it again tomorrow night. No permanent damage though, only permanent good. If I had tonight to live over again I would live it differently. Instead I will take this lesson with me into tomorrow.

This Evening.

Ron worked late tonight so after I put Ponder to bed Afton and I watched John and Kate Plus Eight. She loved it. Every time it a commercial came on she started crying and saying, "Babies! Babies!" There was a giraffe on the show tonight and Afton called it a cat. I laughed and thought "I love how funny my life is." Earlier this evening when we were walking downtown she we saw an African American gentleman dressed in a business suit also out for a walk. Afton pointed at him and started yelling "Obama! Obama!" Really embarrassing, but also really funny. He didn't seem to mind. Oh and today my girls really discovered each other for the first time. Afton would lean over Ponder's swing and talk to her and Ponder would smile, squeal, and laugh out loud. I loved watching them interact. What a sweet gift each day is. I am so grateful.

Afton's First Sentence

Afton said her first sentence this week.

"Where's Daddy?"

Boy, she really loves that guy. And why shouldn't she? What's not to love?

The Whole World in His Hands

Tomorrow my sweet husband leaves the country for a three week long business trip to India and Pakistan. That means that for the next three weeks Afton and I will be without our greatest source of earthly joy. I know other women and babies have had to do without their men for much longer and in much more dangerous situations. My heart truly goes out to them. Knowing that, though, makes me feel his absence no less.

I, also, know and firmly believe that God has the whole world squarely, securely in his hands - India, Pakistan, outer space. No Christian will ever wander outside his all-loving, all-knowing, all-powerful sovereignty. No place is too far, too high, too unstable, or too remote for God to protect his people. This I know and this I believe and this is my sleep granting peace. Still, it is hard for my not worry about Ron's safety and to let my mind wander to worse case scenarios. It is hard to let the dearest thing in the world to me out of my sight and out of my reach for so long.

So this post is just a plea for your prayers, dear friends. Pray for my Ronny. Pray that God will bring him back to me safely. Pray that the days will fly by like seconds. Pray that little Ponder will stay put in my womb until her daddy gets back. Pray that Afton won't miss her daddy too sadly but, that in some sweet way her little heart will grow in even more love for him while he is gone. Pray that Ron and I will be reminded afresh of our love for one another and that the fondness that absence brings us will erase any pettiness that has been born of our familiarity. Pray that I will learn anew to trust God and God alone with the most important things in my life. Pray that He would fill my heart with peace.

Three weeks with my husband in the Eastern Hemisphere. A small concern, even embarrassing to mention, compared with the trials of so many. But it is my present reality. One I dare not face without the gracious aid of my Lord. And so I ask for your prayers. Pray that God will bring him back to me safely. Pray that the days will fly by like seconds. Pray...

Afton is One

First a couple or item of business:
1. I am unabashedly copying this idea from my sister-in-law .
2. Afton turned one almost two months ago. It has taken me a while to get to this.
Dear Afton~
My sweet girl. I cannot believe it has been a year since you caught my eye from across the operating room. I whispered to your Daddy, "Look, there she is!" I know most experts will tell me that newborns can't see very far, certainly not all the way across the room like you were from us that night. All I can say to those experts is that I don't know about most newborns, but I know you were looking right at us. Your facial expression was something I know I will never forget. You had the look of an old man who had just been roused from his bed in the middle of the night. You greeted life with a look on your face that said, "This had better be good!"

I didn't get to hold you right away. You had had a real hard time being born and the pediatricians were making sure you were okay. I could tell by the look you gave us from their station that you were in fact okay. It actually looked like you were just humoring them. You were so expressive right from the start. I knew we were all going to be fast friends and that you would fit in with us perfectly.

And, oh my sweet girl, you certainly have. You have more than fit in. You have embellished and beautified our simple little life in ways we never knew possible. Your father and I adore you. You seemed to take to your life with us right away too. You cried and cried and cried in the car on the way home from the hospital, but as soon as we walked through the door of our building you immediately stopped. It was like you knew you were home. You knew you were where you belonged.

One of the the first things we discovered about you was that you are very adaptable. It doesn't take much to please you. As long as you are with your people and are having your basic needs met you never make a fuss. People are always commenting on how lucky we are to have such and easy-going baby. This personality trait came in very handy for you during the first weeks of your life. Due to several family emergencies you had flown five times by the time you were three months old. All the changes and travel never seemed to bother you. You seemed born to go with the flow.

Another thing that was unique about you was that you had very mature facial expressions. People would say that you looked at them just an adult would. It was really funny. Sometimes your faces were so serious that I felt like you were more mature that I was. It really sometimes seemed like I was caring for a very small adult.

Just because you could make some very serious faces, didn't mean you did not know how to have a good time. Actually, I would say that has been your most defining characteristic so far. Happiness. You are a very happy baby. You are a package of sunshine and smiles. Your zest for life lights up our home everyday. You love almost everything. Your joy is contagious. Your happiness makes us happy. Some of the sweetest moments of my days are coming into you room to get you from your nap and seeing your huge smile when you see me. The smile you give me when I kiss you goodnight is even sweeter. I pray that the gentle happiness that has been your trademark during your first year will be yours for the rest of your life.

You love cell phones. You hold them up to your ear and talk and talk. You love your pink and green blanky that Maw Maw made you. Everytime you come across it throughout your day you put your thumb in your mouth and snuggle it for a few seconds before you continue playing. You love to have a diaper wipe to play with each day. You use it to wipe all your babies' noses and to clean your toys. You love to wipe Mommy and Daddy's noses as well. You love people. Anytime a new person walks up you greet them with "Hi!" in the sweetest voice I have ever heard. You love babies. You call them "Ba". You love to carry your clean diaper for Mommy. You call it "di". You love to push buttons in the elevator and can say "Up" and "Down". You get so happy when Daddy comes home at night. You can hear him in the hall sometimes even before I do. I know that seeing how happy you are to see him makes his whole day worthwhile.

We love you so much Sweet Afton and are so dumbfoundedly grateful to God for lending you to us. I pray that He will give us the grace to love and care for you as He loves and cares for us.

Happy Birthday!

Buy Good Books and Read Them

For the past few weeks Ron and I have been enjoying Charlottesville's annual Gordon Avenue Library book sale . It is something we look forward to every year and is definitely one of our favorite things about Charlottesville. This week is 75% off week which means that patrons of the sale can buy good used books for ridiculous prices. By ridiculous prices I mean they are actually selling books you would want to read for 12 cents. It is quite absurd. Absurdly awesome!

Anyway with all of the books we have been buying lately I want to recommend a couple of jewels that have blessed me in one way or another.

I didn't buy this book at the book sale, but I did read every word of it. Yes, I am proud to say I read all 976 pages. Granted I started in December of 2006 and just finished this week, but nonetheless I read it all. What is more is I thoroughly enjoyed it. It starts in 1580 and finishes in in the late nineties. I heartily recommend it to anyone who loves history or America or both. You do not have to be a hard core history buff, however, to enjoy it. It reads more like a story book than a text book. I think that is how I managed to finish it!



I haven't read this book in its entirety yet and I don't always agree with everything Miss Manners has to say, so this is not a full on recommendation. I am just saying so far I have really enjoyed this book. One thing I like about Miss Manners is that she makes me want to live a fine and beautiful life. That is not the same thing as an expensive life. She inspires me to thoughtful, considerate, tasteful living, which I think is a good thing. I purchased her Guide To Excruciatingly Correct Behavior at the book sale two years ago and found it delightfully entertaining. When I saw her child rearing book at the sale this year I had to get it! So far I like it even better than the first one. Not only is it entertaining, it also seems to contain actual wisdom and insight that I think we will help me as a mother. Consider what she says here:

Miss Manners' dear mother, a teacher, often heard the parental lamentation of "But we give him everything" from those whose children confided in their teacher, separately, how much they cheerfully hated their parents. The parental complaint was followed by a list itemizing valuable goods given.
"I could never find a correlation between the parents' generosity and the child's feeling about them," noted Miss Manners' mother. "Then I began to notice a connection between the child's feelings and the parents' facial expressions when they came to pick him up at school, or even when they just talked about him. The parent who beamed at the child had a loving child, and the one who didn't, didn't. After that, it didn't seem to matter what else the parents did or didn't do."
Miss Manners is happy to present such unmaterialistic news, although she does not deny that many people's fondest childhood memories have to do with toys or other presents. Yet the parent who gives whatever is asked, when it is asked, seems to get no return except increased expectation. The generally sensible parent, who restricts giving to fixed occasions and choice of presents to items that are educational, useful, or apt to be of lasting, rather than fleeting enjoyment, will give enormous pleasure by a rare wild deviation from this policy.

I don't know about you, but I feel wiser for the reading of that.




I read this book when I was engaged and I thought it would really help me as a new wife. I am sure it did, though not nearly as much as it is helping me now on my second reading of it. By helping I really mean giving me a much needed kick to the behind. It was one thing to read it with stars in my eyes and my wedding day and honeymoon ahead of me. It is quite another reading it again with those things, as well as three and half years of marriage and one and two thirds children, already under by belt. True, it is not the inspired word of God, but it does seem to be pretty adept at cutting through to the true thoughts and intents of my heart. Very convicting, but very, very inspring and instructive. I ardently recommend to any woman who has a husband.

Love For Example...

I love finding things that have been lost. Today I had just such a joy. I found a little packet I made filled with all the letters, trinkets, and mementos from my courtship with Ron. I haven't seen it or had any clue where it could have gone in almost three years. My mind believed it to be gone forever. My heart held out hope, as hearts are known to do, that somehow someday it would resurface. Much to the delight of my inner dreamy, mushy girl, my heart was right! I have spent Afton's nap reading all those sweet, sweet words and remembering those sweet, sweet times. I would never cheapen a love note by sharing it publicly, but there was something in my little packet that I do want to share with others. It is a quote on love that I found in a most unlikely place - a book on religion in ancient Mesopotamia. Strange yes, but there it was in the middle of one of most boring books I have ever read part of, the best description of the emotion of love that I have ever heard. I read it just before Ron and I fell in love. I wrote it on a napkin and tacked it to a cork board in my room. When I moved out to get married I tucked it away with all my love letters, forgotten until today. It describes my feelings for Ron now as accurately as it did back then:

"Love for example, innate and irrational, it irresistibly pushes each one of us toward "another", someone in whom we obscurely sense a sort of enrichment indispensable to our lives, a necessary complement to ourselves, whom we must seek out and obtain regardless of all opposition."
~ Jean Bottero, Religion In Ancient Mesopotamia