The Whole World in His Hands

Tomorrow my sweet husband leaves the country for a three week long business trip to India and Pakistan. That means that for the next three weeks Afton and I will be without our greatest source of earthly joy. I know other women and babies have had to do without their men for much longer and in much more dangerous situations. My heart truly goes out to them. Knowing that, though, makes me feel his absence no less.

I, also, know and firmly believe that God has the whole world squarely, securely in his hands - India, Pakistan, outer space. No Christian will ever wander outside his all-loving, all-knowing, all-powerful sovereignty. No place is too far, too high, too unstable, or too remote for God to protect his people. This I know and this I believe and this is my sleep granting peace. Still, it is hard for my not worry about Ron's safety and to let my mind wander to worse case scenarios. It is hard to let the dearest thing in the world to me out of my sight and out of my reach for so long.

So this post is just a plea for your prayers, dear friends. Pray for my Ronny. Pray that God will bring him back to me safely. Pray that the days will fly by like seconds. Pray that little Ponder will stay put in my womb until her daddy gets back. Pray that Afton won't miss her daddy too sadly but, that in some sweet way her little heart will grow in even more love for him while he is gone. Pray that Ron and I will be reminded afresh of our love for one another and that the fondness that absence brings us will erase any pettiness that has been born of our familiarity. Pray that I will learn anew to trust God and God alone with the most important things in my life. Pray that He would fill my heart with peace.

Three weeks with my husband in the Eastern Hemisphere. A small concern, even embarrassing to mention, compared with the trials of so many. But it is my present reality. One I dare not face without the gracious aid of my Lord. And so I ask for your prayers. Pray that God will bring him back to me safely. Pray that the days will fly by like seconds. Pray...

Whistle While You Work

We are on our third day in a row of intense separation anxiety around here. It is the kind where even the simple act of carrying my coffee cup from the living room to the kitchen sink is met with huge tears and terrified, heartbroken wails of protest. Excusing myself to use the bathroom is, of course, much, much worse. It is also a variety of separation that is not particularly particular. It doesn't seem that separation from me personally is what causes distress (that would be kind of flattering and precious) but separation from people in general. If anyone else is here I am completely dispensable, but when it is just me and Afton here my presence seems to rank in necessity right up there with oxygen. What makes this kind of separation anxiety (aloneness anxiety I think describes it better)so trying for me is that it lasts for most of the day, because for most of the day it is just us around here, and it vanishes as soon as Daddy gets home. He never really gets to see it and so of necessity it is a burden I carry alone.

But this post is not really about that. Another post will be soon. I have a theory that separation anxiety is much like puppy love, and will perhaps elaborate on that when I have more time. This post is to be about music, so let me get to that. This morning my frazzled nerves and I visited a sweet blog that asked its reader's what they were thankful for today. The most honest answer I could come up with at the time was easily summed up in two words. Nap Time. I have tons and tons and tons upon tons of things to be thankful for but today, at least at that moment, nap time was topping the list. I wished I had an answer that would be more profound and heartwarming, but if I was being honest that was what I had to say.

Later on, at the commencement of blessed nap time number two, I looked around at the state of my house, which has become an innocent victim of our aloneness anxiety crisis, and felt I had so very much to do before tomorrow, when all I wanted to do was sit down and soak up some silence. I knew that wasn't the best option, that I would feel much better if I reclaimed my living room from its occupiers (toys, pajamas, old magazines, and yes, more than a couple dirty diapers). Before I tackled this I turned on my iPod, something I usually do while cleaning but have neglected in the past few days of survival mode. As soon as I did that everything changed. Birds started chirping, the sunshine poured through my windows, a tangible peace settled upon my living room. I was going to make it and cleaning was going to be fun!

I am so amazed by and so thankful for the transforming power of music! It does many things, but what I am most thankful for today is its power to make mundane tasks more pleasant. Its power to get you through what you've got to do. God didn't have to bless us with it, but I am so glad he did. So to nap time, I add music as the things I am most aware of being thankful for today.