Tuesday, November 29, 2011

Meet Restaurant Rose ~ Our Story.

Last month we had the very fun opportunity of visiting Great Wolf Lodge in Charlotte, NC.   My Dad (or Grandpa as the little people around here call him) was there on a business trip so one day after school we drove up to see him.  Great Wolf Lodge is a wonderful hotel with a full size indoor water park right on the premises.  I am plotting a way to get back there again on a family vacay because in our one afternoon I don't think we took advantage of even half of the fun that that place has to offer.  Plus fancy hotels are my weakness.  I am a sucker for those joints!

After our little water park time Grandpa took us out to dinner at Texas Roadhouse.  I worked at Texas Roadhouse throughout college. ("My belly's achin' my belt's too tight my booty's shakin from left to right say Texas Roadhouse"....wow.)  Anyway, one of my biggest complaints, among many, about my customers through those years was  how so many people would claim they "needed" more bread.  I can't tell you how many times a night I was flagged down and told "Hey, we need more bread."  or worse told "He's needs more bread." and directed to a child who clearly needed anything but more bread.  I mean, sure, the bread at Texas Roadhouse is delicious.  It is also free.  You can have as much of it as you want.   All I am asking is please don't say you need it.  Just say "May I have some more bread?" or "I'd like some more bread."  Because comfortable Americans chilling at Texas Roadhouse on Friday night may need a lot of things - a bit more exercise, some time away, a little peace and quiet, a check up from the neck up.  One thing they don't need is MORE bread.  You get four pieces the moment you come in the door for goodness sake!  Texas Roadhouse bread is impossible to need.  Or so I thought until that night.

Meet Restaurant Rose.

Restaurant Rose is nothing like the little angel baby we call Rosie Posie who lives with us and fills all of our hearts with joy and love.  Rosie Posie is sweet and gentle and happy and loves giving hugs and kisses and smiles.  She is nothing at all like Restaurant Rose.  No, Restaurant Rose has been described as a psychopath, a maniac, a terrorist, a torture device.  And that was just by her parents.  There is no telling what she has been called by other  restaurant goers unfortunate enough to have dined at an establishment at the same time as Restaurant Rose.  Restaurant Rose regularly engages in activities including but not limited to scream-crying at the top of her lungs, writhing as if she is in unbearable pain, wretching her body around as if she is having a seizure, slapping people who try to give her food, gagging as if all food she is given has been poisoned (even when the food is something she eats all the time at home and EVEN if the food itself has been brought from home),  trying to throw herself from the high chair as if it were a burning building, and throwing everything that is within her reach (on the night in question she threw a fork at another guest who no doubt needed more bread).

We don't get to see my dad often so I was hoping Restaurant Rose would not make an appearance that night.  It was moments after we were seated that we both realized that Restaurant Rose was already with us.  The only thing keeping her at bay were the yummy, and yes, legendary Texas Roadhouse Rolls.  As she was finishing up the last one on our table (the moment pictured above) I looked at Ron and said much to my shame "I am about five seconds away from knowing what it feels like to NEED more bread!"

One of the ways God keeps me humble is the "Judge 'em Join 'em" policy He seems to have with me.  It repeatedly happens that I find myself in the shoes of people I used to enjoy looking down on.  So it turned out that a piece of humble pie was on the menu that night at my old stomping grounds with my good friend Restaurant Rose.  A night to remember indeed.

1 comment:

Denise said...

Ah the Texas Roadhouse days. Oh, I sang along with the little cheer.

Your description of Restaurant Rose is hilarious.