Makers, Bathers, Besties, Growers - Our Story

Makers...

Bathers (Rose's first time with a party watie. She loved it!) ....

Besties...

Growers (We have actual vegetables, people!)...

Totally Worth It - Our Story

Ron loves gear lists. He works tirelessly on them. I had to take a picture of one of them. They are one many adorable things about my dear husband. This is his gear list for the three day bike trip he took last week. Seeing how excited he gets about planning for these kinds of outings makes the days of single parenting while he is gone totally worth it!

Who is this party animal toddler where my sweet baby girl used to be?

Next week this delightful little costume will be worn by our very own resident "ballet-er" in her long awaited "Big Performance." Sadly, she now prefers the term ballerina. Why is everyone growing up so fast around here?

We finally put our wonderful Christmas present of a zoo membership to use last week and the girls loved it so much I can tell we are going to be making up for lost time all summer long! Sissy was especially taken with the animals. She was glowing with love for them! She wanted to name each one. Her smile in the second picture melts my heart!

The kick me, steal my covers, toss and turn, drool on my pillow, breathe loud, sometimes even fall off of the bed and generally keep me awake all night long, but a day is coming when these chubby little cherubs will be young women and will no longer beg to sleep in Mommy's bed when Daddy is out of town, so until that day comes may no snuggles be left on the table and may I say yes every chance I get!

The Thunder are breaking my heart but I will stay up until midnight every time they play and I will cheer for them until the bitter end.

Piggies!!

There are no words...

Someday my coffee table won't be draped in a Disney Princess Snuggie everyday to be made into a "beautiful bed" for the likes of Tiny Sister, Buzz's head, Mulan, and Glow Baby but I hope that day is far, far away.

Just Keeping It Real -- Part 2

These little preciouses (even, er, especially the little one) trampled my nerves today like a Walmart doormat on Black Friday. By the time lunch rolled around I could barely breathe. So, naturally, I took all the oxygen I could muster to throw my head back toward the ceiling and yell "AWWWWWW!" as loud as I could for a good seven to ten seconds without stopping.

Afton said, "Mommy, is that because you don't like whining?"

I will leave that to her and to ya'll to figure out.

I read this last night. That lady gets it. Guess I need to read it again.

Because of the great response to my last keeping it real post I did consider putting a picture of up of some of the "science experiments" I have in my fridge right now but, alas, my pride is too great. Don't worry though, I definitely have enough subject matter to keep this series going for a while.

God Makes People Mad All The Time.

If you like making people mad this post is not for you. I know there are people in the world who do like making people mad and they need someone else to speak into their lives because all I would say would be "Hey, stop making people mad. It's making me feel uncomfortable." And really how helpful is that?

If, however, making people mad makes you miserable -- welcome to my world. I hate making people mad. I hate disappointing people. I hate burdening them or annoying them. These are some of the worst feelings I can think of and ones that I avoid at many costs. Earlier this week I realized this is something that I avoid at too many costs.

I was "playing" outside with my girls on a beautiful morning. Actually I was ignoring them and brushing off their excited comments so I could focus on doing something that was a total waste of time and that I wasn't even enjoying. Why? Because someone (who is not a regular reader of my blog nor a family member and so probably not you) had suggested it to me and I knew if I didn't finish by that afternoon they would find out and know I hadn't taken their suggestion.

All of a sudden (probably after shushing one of my kids or saying "Oh nice." and not even looking up at the dirt mound they had built) I asked myself. "Why the heck am I still doing this?" and before I had time to contrive a good reason I answered myself (Yes, that IS what crazy people do.) "So I won't make {REDACTED} mad."

Wow. And I had to admit that was the whole reason I was doing it. Not another reason at all was even contributing to it. Because I didn't want to risk disappointing someone I was neglecting the important for what in this case was utterly pointless. Ouch.

And then I had the most liberating thought I have had in a while. God makes people mad all the time. He is perfect and He is good and He is kind and He IS love and yet he manages to make millions of people angry every single day. I place a high value on how much what I do will please or displease others. It was huge epiphany for me to realize that in this way I was not sharing God's values. When Jesus was on Earth he made people angry too. He made them angry enough to kill him. I let whether or not something will anger or disappoint someone be the deciding factor in whether or not I do a lot. It wouldn't be too much of a stretch to say I do that all the time. That's not what Jesus did.

I thought I was thinking of others by not wanting to make them mad, but in reality I was thinking of myself. I wasn't trying to prevent the suffering of others I was trying to mitigate my own discomfort by making sure by whatever means I felt necessary people were rarely displeased with me. My avoidance of the anger of others is nothing like godliness. It is definitely not Christlike. At root it is selfishness and one thing I know about selfishness is that it makes everything worse.

So where do I go from here? Start making people mad on purpose? Stop considering at all how my actions will affect others? No, of course not. As Sissy would say, "Thas not kind!" As Afton would say, "Now you're just being wacky." I think I need to stop dressing up my own self-protective tendencies like they are sacrificial love and learn to really love sacrificially the way Jesus did. His unselfishness, love, and willingness to sacrifice are unmatched in history but he was not afraid of the anger of men. I think the more I grow to be like Him the less afraid of it I will be as well.

One Job That Matters

It took me three babies and four years of motherhood to learn that on days when my baby is sick I only have one job that matters.



And as you can see it is not personal grooming.

Like It Was Yesterday.

This is Afton yesterday:

I distinctly remember taking this picture yesterday morning. She was having her first solid foods and loving it. No surprise. She loves loving things. I know it was just yesterday. Maybe the day before.

But then this morning this happened:

That same little baby that I had been feeding yesterday, with all her characteristic zeal, and as you can see, with no lack of panache or style, fed her sister breakfast while I made breakfast for everyone else. Well, while I made breakfast for everyone else, ran upstairs to tell her daddy to come down and see, took a million pictures, and rejoiced in the fact that I had a child old enough to help me. To actually help me.

But wait. When did my baby get old enough to feed babies? How did this happen?

Those old ladies in grocery stores and cheesy country songs aren't kidding around when they say stuff like:

"Don't blink."

"The days are long but the years are short."

"Enjoy them. They grow up so fast."

Because, boy, it really does feel like it was yesterday...

What Else I Get Wrong.

I am often...often...overwhelmed by all I want to teach my children. How to use the potty, how to clean up after themselves, how to call 911, what it means to be kind, what it means to be brave, what kind of boys will be worth their time someday and what kind won't. I mean they came to me knowing nothing. It's a pretty big job.

It is even bigger when I consider that they learn mostly by example. Now I have not only what I want to teach them to worry about but all the things I don't want to teach them as well. How to lose your temper, how to make a mountain out of a molehill, how to be lazy ... impatient ... inflexible...unforgiving. How to give the silent treatment, how to cuss, how to worry and gossip instead of pray, how to hate, how to fear.

See, I am already feeling overwhelmed again. But I am realizing something lately. That if I can teach my children the spectacular truth you will hear about below...really teach it to them so that it takes on a life of its own inside their hearts...well, then it won't really matter what else I get wrong.

(WARNING: Mildly cheesy video. Just close your eyes and listen to the words.)

Remember Who You Wanted To Be

Somehow I earlier this fall I happened upon Gretchen Rubin's Twelve Personal Commandments. The idea resounded with me. Calling them commandments felt icky to me but the idea was bewitching. It reminded me of another bewitching idea I had happened upon several falls ago.

I hate bumper stickers. I could rant your face off about that, but why? In the fall of 2004 I was a newlywed and living briefly in a Holiday Inn. I came home from work one day and in the Holiday Inn parking lot I saw an old beater with a bumper sticker on in that read "Remember Who You Wanted To Be." The idea resounded with me. It was the first bumper sticker I had ever seen that was worth the glue that held it to the bumper. It has haunted me ever since.

I have seen what it looks like when people forget who they wanted to be. It is sad. It musty and dank and depressing. It is everywhere. I knew the moment I read those words that I didn't want to forget who I wanted to be. What I have never been confident about was how I am supposed to make sure I remember.

I think that is why Gretchen's commandment idea was so poignant to me. What do I do in day to day life when I want to remember something? I make list. I write it down. That is what my personal commandments are - a list to help me remember who I wanted to me.

After I made my list I still grappled with my uneasiness with the word commandment. It is a loaded word. I toyed with other words like reminder or principle but they didn't capture the point of the exercise. Commandment is the only word...commanding...enough to express what I want to do with this list. I want to command myself to remember who I wanted to be.

Not in a biblical sense but in a military sense. My mission is remembering who I wanted to be and these are my marching orders.

Sir, yes, sir!

1. Be here now.

2. Give grace.

3. Laugh.

4. Let your smile make you happy.

5. Suffer long.

6. Don't assume another's neurosis.

7. Play along.

8. Empathize.

9. Go outside.

10. Say I'm sorry.

11. Care.

12. Choose and offer freedom.

Happy Fall Ya'll

Seasons change, children grow up, we grow older, the world stays on track, all things pass, time marches on. God is so good. He's so good to me.

Chances to buy back a bit of your childhood wonder don't come around everyday.

This plate may not mean much to you. For me it is the joy of childhood. Being loved, belonging, the world being right.

My Nana had this china when I was a kid. I have eaten an untold number of Sunday dinners, Thanksgiving turkeys, and Christmas hams from plates that look just like these. Not the mention all the chocolate pie I have eaten off of this plate's baby brother. These dainty blue flowers bring with them a stampede of memories. My dad and Papa discussing theology and politics at the table. My brother saying "Nana, you really outdid yourself this time." and then looking anxiously around the table to see if he had used that phrase properly. My Papa giving my Aunt Debby a hard time "It's gravy night on Debby's shirt!" and Debby squealing at him and appealing to Nana, "Mom, make him stop!" We would eat and eat and eat until we were full and then we would have dessert. Nana would ask who wanted dessert and without fail Papa would say, "I don't ever remember turning it down except the one time I misunderstood the lady." When we were done my mom and Aunt Debby would fight over which one of them got to do the dishes for Nana. They both wanted to. From my childish point of view we were all unspeakably happy and this unspeakable happiness was all I knew for a long, long time.

In the years since big kid realities like disease and divorce have dismantled this happy scene. One by one those dainty blue flowered dishes all broke or were given away. Some perhaps were placed in storage and forgotten. My memories of those days were placed in storage and forgotten. New dishes replaced the old ones and my grown up reality replaced my childhood.

Until a couple of weeks ago when I was wandering aimlessly around my church garage sale. A pitcher caught my eye. Actually it was those dear blue flowers on the pitcher that caught my eye. The lady selling them must have seen it in my face...the look of seeing a long lost friend somewhere you would never have thought to look for her. She pulled the box out from under the table. A full set of the very same china my Nana had. She would sell it to me for fifty dollars. Chances to buy back a bit of your childhood wonder don't come around everyday. A quick trip to the ATM and they were mine.

Once they were home I left them on the counter like this for days. Every time I passed them feeling gleeful that they were mine to make glorious memories on with my children. Seeing my children celebrate with these loved old dishes and their big innocent eyes will be beautiful marriage of the past and present. An experience I am so thankful I will likely be able to have many times over in the coming years!

If you were just wondering where the best place to get boxes is... now I feel silly!

A friend of mine recently asked me for moving advice. I moved a lot when I was a kid. I have had three major moves since I was an adult. Adults are a lot less adaptable than kids so I actually think in a way moving is harder for an adult than for a child. I feel like I have learned a few good lessons about moving the hard way and decided to share what I told my friend about them here to maybe save someone else a little trouble:

I have one big piece of advice about moving that I had to learn the hard way about three times before I finally figured it out. It may seem weird but here it is.....decide you are going to love it before you go and realize that just because you love where you came from doesn't mean you can't love where you are going. What I mean is for two of my three big moves as a grown up (one to Virginia from Oklahoma and one from one town in Virginia to another where I didn't know anyone) I was so busy thinking about the place I had come from and how awesome it was that I wouldn't let myself see all the good things around me in my new place. It was kinda like I was afraid to love the new place because I already loved the old place so much. So I spent a lot of time focusing on how much I missed the old place and no time enjoying the new place. Then after a lot of time had passed I would wake up and realize that this new place isn't bad at all and actually has a lot of good about it. I always regretted spending so much time being sad and miserable at the beginning of new place that I would eventually end up loving . Anyway so when we moved here I decided ahead of time that I was going to love it from the beginning. It didn't mean I wouldn't miss Virginia and all the memories I had there. It did mean I wouldn't set my new town up for failure by constantly comparing it to where I had come from. I would find things I liked about it right away and start enjoying them. More importantly, I would start treating it and thinking of it like home not some strange new place. Those are hard things to do for someone who is sentimental like me, but I made a decision to do it and this has by far been the best move ever. I have realized through all my moves that you can truly love more than one place with all your heart and that makes opening my heart to a new place much easier because I don't feel like I have to turn my back on other places. Places that in their own way are still very much home to me. I don't know if that makes sense but I hope so! Also, I hope that is the kind of advice you were looking for. If you were just wondering where the best place to get boxes is... now I feel silly!

One other thing I had to learn the hard way. Making new friends as an adult is a lot more challenging than it was when we were young. Adults have their own routines and ways of doing things. They aren't really worried about making new friends. They don't have to meet all new people every year in classes like kids do. So my advice for when you move is don't wait to start making friends. Jump right in. Find a church and maybe hobby or something and start meeting people. Don't wait for them to ask you over or out for dinner. You do it. The quicker you jump in and make it happen the quicker you will have friends and the quicker you have friends the quicker you will feel really at home. I didn't do this in my last move and I found it hard the entire time to make friends. I learned though from watching a few military families come in and out of town that when you are the new person the responsibility for making friends lies with you. If you put forth the effort people will happily open their hearts to you. You just have to jump in and do it. If you are shy like me that is hard but totally worth it.

One awesome thing about moving when you are our age is that you you get to take your best friends with you. Having Ron and my girls with me means home is anywhere I am!

No Thanks To Tummy Time.

So, it turns out Tummy Time is a myth. At least I am prepared to call it that. Tummy time? If you have had a baby in the past five or so years you know what I am talking about. Tummy time. Since we put our babies to sleep on their backs now to reduce SIDS risks we have to give them tummy time each day to help their necks get strong and stuff like that. All the doctors and books say so. If your babies are anything like mine they hate tummy time. It is more like heart wrenching scream time. But if you are like me you endure the screams because tummy time is good for them. They need it. Well, I am here to say maybe not. With my first two babies I was a very good tummy time mommy. Ten minutes on their tummies everyday whether they liked it or not. With Rose not so much. Life has been out of control since she was born and there just never seemed to be good time to make a baby unnecessarily miserable even if it was for her own good. She has done tummy time maybe three times in her whole life. And guess what? She is perfectly normal. Afton and Ponder rolled over at about three months.....and so did Rose. Afton and Ponder could support their head unaided at a little after four months.....and so can Rose. I had been feeling like a pretty terrible mom for not making Rose do tummy time. I mean it is important, right? Without it how will she ever hold her head up or crawl? Imagine my surprise when I came downstairs to little Rose who had never had any tummy time to speak of and had been on her back just moments before and found this:

She had rolled over and was holding her head erect! No thanks to tummy time. Emperor Tummy Time you aren't wearing any clothes and you won't be terrorizing any babies around here anymore! I wonder what else we do to make ourselves and our kids miserable unnecessarily? What myths have you figured out? Let me know and set me free!

The Kind of Information I Can Use.

Found out some things I didn't know or hadn't thought of recently. One is if you leave your shower curtain open after you take a shower for long enough to let it dry less mold will grow in your shower and your bathroom will smell fresher. Now this is the kind of information I can use! Maybe everyone else already knew that but I didn't. Makes sense though. Just make sure to close it later or you will get mold on your shower liner.

Also, if you need help knowing how to make sweet tea and everyone you ask makes it seem like an unknowable mystery then just go to grits.com. It is pretty simple really.

Another one is if you need a warm compress a disposable diaper will work great. Just pour hot water into one and hold it on the spot that needs it. The water can even be infused with whatever kind of healing herbs you want! I put all of our outgrown newborn diapers in the medicine cabinet to use in times of need. Works great for mastitis or other nursing issues.

Cabbage on the affected area knocks out mastitis as good as an antibiotic. Email me if you want more details.

Like I said this is the kind of information I can use.

Happy Birthday Ponder Sissy!

1. She answers more quickly to Sissy than to Ponder.

2. She thinks for herself.

3. You can't make Sissy do anything Sissy doesn't want to do.

4. She loves to snuggle.

5. She prefers juice, but will drink water out of her "watoo boddool."

6. Her skin is probably the softest surface on the planet.

7. "I wuv you."

8. "I baseball."

9. "I go back to church. NO! I go back to school."

10. She has the most adorable version of "Take Me Out To The Ballgame." You will probably never hear it though because she won't give command performances. (See #3.)

11. Like her sister Afton she loves Sleeping Beauty. She likes to pretend she is "MannyWetter" the blue fairy. (Merryweather.)

12. She can sing every word to the Sleeping Beauty song "Once Upon A Dream" and has been able to sing it all since she was just over one year old. She could sing that entire song before she was even really talking.

13. She loves to play with Afton. Just follows her around and giggles her heart out.

14. From the first moment she laid eyes on baby Rose she was smitten. She calls her Rosie. She sounds so cute when she says it I think I am going to let it stick.

15. She is fearless.

15. She is very independent.

16. She is no good after nap until she has been snuggled for at least five minutes. "Hold you." And what a delicious five minutes they are.

17. She loves her small baby doll named "Tiny Sister."

18. She also loves her bigger baby doll named "Boy."

19. She knows and understands a lot more than she lets on. Every now and then I catch her being smarter than she wants me to think she is.

20. She removed the lighting and music piece from inside her Glow Worm and uses it as a "lantern". (See #19)

21. We call her our little engineer. (See #20)

22. We think she is going to be a lefty. (See #21)

23. We have yet to find a form of discipline that deters her from anything she has her heart set on doing. Thankfully, we still have prayer.

24. She is ridiculously cute in pig tails.

25. You'll probably never see her wearing them though because she won't leave them in. (See #3)

26. She loves silly games.

27. She loves listening to "my songs" in the car.

28. Holy Holy Holy is her favorite song.

29. She calls all balls basketballs and she loves them.

30. She can already drink out of a big girl cup and sits in a big girl chair at the table.

31. She is heartbroken at the indignity of having her food cut into bite size pieces. She cries and cries and moans "Like a big girl! Like a big girl!"

32. She has a lot of nicknames. Peanut, Sweet P, Putter Butter but "Ponder Sissy" is what Afton has been calling her since she was about five months old and that is by far her most widely used nickname. Sissy doesn't seem like a nickname at all anymore. That is just who she is.

33. "I Sissy!"

34. She loves princesses.

35. "Sissy, are you a princess?" "No! I orange."

36. You have to earn her smile, but when you do it is a smile that will melt your heart.

37. She loves her princess potty Daddy got her. "I did it! Gwate job!"

38. She can build a serious "cackle"with legos and blocks. (Castle.)

39. Her favorite toy to date is a small yellow strip of plastic named "Stripe."

40. She loves Wilson the dog next door.

41. She is not easily impressed.

42. She can sit and turn the pages of books for hours.

43. She is perfectly happy to play all by herself.

44. She likes taking things apart and putting them back together. (See #21.)

45. She likes things to be just so.

46. She calls all clothing "jammies".

47. She loves all shoes and can walk quite well in adult shoes. Even boots.

48. Her favorite book is "We're Going on a Bear Hunt" and she knows most of it by heart. She calls it "Tip Toe".

49. When Afton asks her when she will be done with a certain toy she always says very confidently "Five."

50. We can already tell that is going to be an athlete.

51. She will climb anything. (See # 15)

52. She can balance like nobody's business.

53. Still, I know it is just a matter of time until she falls down all of our stairs.

54. At the beginning of the summer she was terrified of water and swimming, now she can't get enough.

55. She is lost without Afton.

56. She loves riding on Daddy's shoulders.

57. She gets carsick just like Mommy.

58. She loves dressing up.

59. She turns purple when she eats or gets cold. Pretty crazy really.

60. She likes to ask Rose "You naughty? You nice? You a boy? You a girl?"

61. "I fight you!"

62. "And then....and then....and then."

63. "Thas rude!"

64. She has best lion roar I have ever heard!

65. She has an iron will.

66. She is not easily impressed.

67. "I no like it."

69. She likes to be with her people.

70. She has been finding a way to tip over her car seat since she was an infant.

71. She doesn't like help going to the potty.

72. She doesn't like help with pretty much anything.

73. "No, I help!"

74. She likes to help others though.

75. She loves to push the button on the coffee pot in the mornings.

76. She loves Woody (also called "Toy Movie) and Buzz Lightyear (also called "Buzz Light").

77. She is a watcher and a listener.

78. She loves buckling and unbuckling any kind of buckle.

79. She loves coloring on the walls. If she can't do it with crayons she will do it with painted blocks or something like that.

80. She likes Little Einsteins.

81. She loves animals.

83. She loves pointing at things and telling you what they are.

84. She doesn't really like snow, grass, or sand.

85. She loves balloons.

86. She is our pickiest eater. We used to have to put a little bit of orange juice in her milk to get her to drink it. Yuck!

87. She is a quick and quiet learner.

88. She claps her hands to tell you she wants something.

89. When we are eating at Chipotle she starts off using a fork but usually resorts to finishing her burrito bowl with her fingers.

90. She can make a pretty big mess when she is eating but it will all be on her hands and face and the table and floor. Her clothes seem to always make it out unscathed.

91. "It's not easy being Sissy." and "That's just Sissy being Sissy." have become common phrases around here to describe life with Sissy.

92. Lately when she sees Rose she points at her and says, "Mommy, what's that? That Rosie Posie."

93. "Right, Mommy?"

94. When we are in the car and I smile at her in the rear view mirror she melts into one of the cutest smiles I have ever seen. It never fails.

95. It may not be easy being Sissy, but she does a great job at it.

96. She has also done a great job at capturing all our hearts.

97. She makes each of our lives richer and more beautiful. So happy God chose to add her to our family.

98. She is one of the sweetest blessings He has ever given us.

99. Happy Birthday Ponder Sissy! Can't believe we have only known you for two years.

100. Looking forward to many more years of seeing you grow in grace and beauty and just spending everyday watching Sissy being Sissy.

I Must Have Been a Pill for my Mom to Feed.

1. Today for lunch the kids had bananas, carrots, and yogurt (or yotes as we like to call them around here). Ponder is getting so good at feeding herself. Not only did I not have to feed her I even went to my bedroom to change clothes while they were feeding themselves lunch....ALONE! This is huge! Ponder also climbed the stairs leading up to our house today all by herself. Also huge. Don't tell her Daddy. :)

2. Tonight for dinner we are having chicken pot pie. I can hardly wait. Another thing I used to HATE as kid, but love now. I must have been a pill for my Mom to feed. Bless her heart. I remember when my family would have hotdogs she would make me a hotdog bun with peanut butter on it. What a sweetie! Our recipe tonight belongs to my mother who somehow made it through 18 years of finding something I was willing to eat.c

3-4 cooked (boiled) chicken breasts, cut up into bite size pieces.

2 cans cream of potato soup

Bag of frozen veggies

About 1/2 cup of milk

Pepper

Two pie shells (the kind you can roll out like Pillsbury)

Put a pie shell in a Pam'd pie plate. In separate bowl combine chicken, potato soup, veggies and milk. Add more milk if you need to ... you want it moist but not running over the edge and swimming in liquid. Pepper everything -- no need to salt it because the soup is salty enough. Put the other pie shell on top. Trim the edges and crimp them shut. Poke several steam holes in the top.

Cook at 375 for about 1 hour, 15 minutes or until the crust is brown.

Like I said I can't wait!

Afton's First Sentence

Afton said her first sentence this week.

"Where's Daddy?"

Boy, she really loves that guy. And why shouldn't she? What's not to love?

Shared Prayers

This book of shared prayers has been a tremendous encouragement, rebuke, teacher, blessing in my life. It has helped me to turn my eyes upon Jesus like few other books ever have. I have recently rediscovered it and wanted to introduce it to any of you who have never read it. I heartily encourage you to find a copy and be sharpened and comforted by its beautiful, worship inspiring words. I know you won't regret it.

My Child

Though my mom is very good to remind that no matter how big she seems compared to Ponder she is still very much a baby, Afton seems more and more like a child everyday. She will always be my baby, but with every tick of the clock she is becoming more and more my little girl as well. She is sleeping in her big girl bed full time now and some time early next week she will get her first roommate. (Fingers crossed.) Before I know it Ponder will become a little girl too and the late night giggles of sisters will fill our hall and be music to our ears.

Afton's New Roommate

The Whole World in His Hands

Tomorrow my sweet husband leaves the country for a three week long business trip to India and Pakistan. That means that for the next three weeks Afton and I will be without our greatest source of earthly joy. I know other women and babies have had to do without their men for much longer and in much more dangerous situations. My heart truly goes out to them. Knowing that, though, makes me feel his absence no less.

I, also, know and firmly believe that God has the whole world squarely, securely in his hands - India, Pakistan, outer space. No Christian will ever wander outside his all-loving, all-knowing, all-powerful sovereignty. No place is too far, too high, too unstable, or too remote for God to protect his people. This I know and this I believe and this is my sleep granting peace. Still, it is hard for my not worry about Ron's safety and to let my mind wander to worse case scenarios. It is hard to let the dearest thing in the world to me out of my sight and out of my reach for so long.

So this post is just a plea for your prayers, dear friends. Pray for my Ronny. Pray that God will bring him back to me safely. Pray that the days will fly by like seconds. Pray that little Ponder will stay put in my womb until her daddy gets back. Pray that Afton won't miss her daddy too sadly but, that in some sweet way her little heart will grow in even more love for him while he is gone. Pray that Ron and I will be reminded afresh of our love for one another and that the fondness that absence brings us will erase any pettiness that has been born of our familiarity. Pray that I will learn anew to trust God and God alone with the most important things in my life. Pray that He would fill my heart with peace.

Three weeks with my husband in the Eastern Hemisphere. A small concern, even embarrassing to mention, compared with the trials of so many. But it is my present reality. One I dare not face without the gracious aid of my Lord. And so I ask for your prayers. Pray that God will bring him back to me safely. Pray that the days will fly by like seconds. Pray...

Afton is One

First a couple or item of business:
1. I am unabashedly copying this idea from my sister-in-law .
2. Afton turned one almost two months ago. It has taken me a while to get to this.
Dear Afton~
My sweet girl. I cannot believe it has been a year since you caught my eye from across the operating room. I whispered to your Daddy, "Look, there she is!" I know most experts will tell me that newborns can't see very far, certainly not all the way across the room like you were from us that night. All I can say to those experts is that I don't know about most newborns, but I know you were looking right at us. Your facial expression was something I know I will never forget. You had the look of an old man who had just been roused from his bed in the middle of the night. You greeted life with a look on your face that said, "This had better be good!"

I didn't get to hold you right away. You had had a real hard time being born and the pediatricians were making sure you were okay. I could tell by the look you gave us from their station that you were in fact okay. It actually looked like you were just humoring them. You were so expressive right from the start. I knew we were all going to be fast friends and that you would fit in with us perfectly.

And, oh my sweet girl, you certainly have. You have more than fit in. You have embellished and beautified our simple little life in ways we never knew possible. Your father and I adore you. You seemed to take to your life with us right away too. You cried and cried and cried in the car on the way home from the hospital, but as soon as we walked through the door of our building you immediately stopped. It was like you knew you were home. You knew you were where you belonged.

One of the the first things we discovered about you was that you are very adaptable. It doesn't take much to please you. As long as you are with your people and are having your basic needs met you never make a fuss. People are always commenting on how lucky we are to have such and easy-going baby. This personality trait came in very handy for you during the first weeks of your life. Due to several family emergencies you had flown five times by the time you were three months old. All the changes and travel never seemed to bother you. You seemed born to go with the flow.

Another thing that was unique about you was that you had very mature facial expressions. People would say that you looked at them just an adult would. It was really funny. Sometimes your faces were so serious that I felt like you were more mature that I was. It really sometimes seemed like I was caring for a very small adult.

Just because you could make some very serious faces, didn't mean you did not know how to have a good time. Actually, I would say that has been your most defining characteristic so far. Happiness. You are a very happy baby. You are a package of sunshine and smiles. Your zest for life lights up our home everyday. You love almost everything. Your joy is contagious. Your happiness makes us happy. Some of the sweetest moments of my days are coming into you room to get you from your nap and seeing your huge smile when you see me. The smile you give me when I kiss you goodnight is even sweeter. I pray that the gentle happiness that has been your trademark during your first year will be yours for the rest of your life.

You love cell phones. You hold them up to your ear and talk and talk. You love your pink and green blanky that Maw Maw made you. Everytime you come across it throughout your day you put your thumb in your mouth and snuggle it for a few seconds before you continue playing. You love to have a diaper wipe to play with each day. You use it to wipe all your babies' noses and to clean your toys. You love to wipe Mommy and Daddy's noses as well. You love people. Anytime a new person walks up you greet them with "Hi!" in the sweetest voice I have ever heard. You love babies. You call them "Ba". You love to carry your clean diaper for Mommy. You call it "di". You love to push buttons in the elevator and can say "Up" and "Down". You get so happy when Daddy comes home at night. You can hear him in the hall sometimes even before I do. I know that seeing how happy you are to see him makes his whole day worthwhile.

We love you so much Sweet Afton and are so dumbfoundedly grateful to God for lending you to us. I pray that He will give us the grace to love and care for you as He loves and cares for us.

Happy Birthday!